My fellow Americans,
It is with a greatly perturbed heart that I must share with you a devastating problem that I have recently encountered on the streets of downtown Portsmouth. It is a problem so potentially pervasive, so potentially destructive to our entire way of life (worse even than the swine flu or the economic collapse - which means that the media's silence can only be explained by governmental conspiracy) that I must command all of you to tell a friend about it immediately, lest it become A THING™
I first saw it on my way out of BNG yesterday. I was so shocked that I stared in bewildered amusement until I realized how rude it is to stare in public. Granted, the entire experience may only be a product of over-caffeinated delusions...
Leaving BNG, what did I see but a man wearing Uggs.
An artistic rendition of the phenomenon. I promptly called Sarah (as it appears to be A THING™, first developed in Moscow, that I call her when I see some awesome testament to Bad Fashion) and she tried to explain it away by asking if perhaps he was doing a Walk of Shame...
No. No explanations can legitimate this phenomenon. Beware Godzillas wearing Man Uggs. Timeo Danaos et Uggs ferentes.
From the West Parlor*,
A Very Frightened Zamerzikar
*cf. In the House
3 weeks ago