Days off = good. Tourists = bad.

This is indicative of almost every customer interaction yesterday.

T.: Medium skim latte to go.

Woman: Did you just say a small vanilla latte?

T.: No, that's a medium skim latte.

Woman, reaching for the cup: Oh, that's not what I ordered.

T.: It's probably someone else's, then.

[Woman blinks, wondering why she is not served before the line of other people waiting for their espresso beverages. Meanwhile the individual who ordered skim latte rescues it from Ursula's clutches.]

I think I've come up with a solution (a part 2 to my Theory of Economic Retribution):

-All customers using our bathrooms without purchasing anything will pay a nominal charge of $2.
-All customers ordering only tap water will pay a nominal charge of $.50.
-All customers wishing to cut the line and have their espresso drink made immediately will pay a variable rate of no less than $1 and no more than $5.

-At no time will said monetary exchanges go near the cash register, as they are all illegal.