In preparation for my trip to England to visit my friends Kipling, Pigeon, and Union Jack, I’ve been reading a hysterical blog I discovered via Wif’s non-Wer&Wif blog.
By “reading” I mean when I have internet access I save 2 or 3 months from 2004 or 2005 into a word document and read them when I get sick of reading about Russian architects in the dorm.
I’m excited about the differences in British and American English. From JohnnyB (who writes that blog I mentioned not two sentences ago, remember?) I’ve learned that in British English you can:
Use companies and teams as weird collective nouns:
“Are you sure Nike don’t make bowls shoes?”You can use new and exciting words, usually starting with “k”!
“In an exciting match, Chelsea have toppled Manchester United."
knackered (tired)You can play new games!
cricket ( 1) very slow-paced baseball; 2) Quidditch without brooms)I’m terribly excited, really. I hope that when I’ve mastered British English there will be at least half as many flower petals falling from the sky as there were at the end of the version of Pygmalion that Earl Grey and I saw.
Bowls (I think it’s like curling (kurling?), except without coffee pots, and on the grass?)
Snooker (sadly, I don’t think anyone gets Snickers&trade, nor do they get kissed, during play.)